I know how to get rid of it.
There are two big sources of the junk in my life. And they have been with me for such a long time that I have become a junkie. Take them away from me and—some days later—I would go dumpster diving to get them back. And if not, I will get brand new ones.
And this is a habit that I am not proud of.
Habit in the above paragraph is bad. It wasn’t before but now it is. It was terribly easy to fight it years ago because it all came from without. Now it is within. And what makes this worse? I betray myself. While, yes, I may apologize but that would just be lip service. Sorry is but a word. Contrition may be automatic but that is like watching a robot confess. No remorse, regret, or guilt. Only words.
But I need words to get me out of this loop. I need words to clear the junk.