Officially Exhausted | Proper Grand Seduction

It’s now a week since I landed a job.

After what felt like a lifetime, something else other than books and the Internet now keeps me occupied. A whole place now has me on my toes, even after I have clocked out and would be miles away from its door.

Predictably, because I was unengaged for long time, I almost forgot what it felt like to be pressured by deadlines, frustrated by sources and resources, and panic about what to do next. Oddly, it’s refreshing. And I revel in it, while the feeling is still new. I am certain it too will get old. I don’t know when or how. I am just certain of it. That is why, for the past few days, I am happy about the mundane and the banal.

  • I relish my seven-hour sleep. Or however long I sleep. I now want more time with my mistress; she and her sheets, blankets, and pillows. With the cool weather these days, the bed is more inviting and sleep has become terribly seductive.
  • I engage in a confusing love-hate relationship with Metro Manila traffic, particularly the one that EDSA is notorious for. I love the traffic because I get extra downtime, especially when I am sitting down in a bus. I hate it because – if I get late – that would be a point against me.
  • I anticipate office breaks. They may not be like how I had it at the old office: 1.5 hours for lunch, where my lunch buddy and I could go to a restaurant or a mall to eat or the 30 minutes for merienda, where I could not worry about a long line at convenience stores; but breaks do serve their purpose.
  • I delight in going home. As a bona fide, certified, and verified long-standing member of the Straight Home Club, it pleases me to race for a few minutes: the pavement becomes my track, my sneakers turn into wheels while I into a hot rod, and strangers become fellow racers. I aim to make a new record daily. And if I find a new route along with that, that would be cool Plus those fast songs aren’t just BGM—they give an added boost to the step!
  • I rediscovered the weekends. Saturdays and Sundays now have new meaning to me: they are essential to my sanity, health, and wholeness.
  • I await the holidays and vacation. Being on leave for way too long dulled the excitement of red letter days and their like. Whenever the government declared a long weekend and everyone was back flipping and somersaulting in joy, I was just drinking water and going, “Meh.” Now, I could see myself raging online and raving in the streets for having three days, a sandwich day, or even just one day free of work.
  • I have to get home! When I was there all the time, I wanted out. And now that I am not for the better part of the day, I couldn’t wait to be there.

Maybe I channeled Murray French and the rest of good folks of Tickle Cove. Somewhere between today and last year, I found my Dr. Lewis, so to speak. With the proper grand seduction, I finally have what I wanted.

I am glad that I now officially exhausted five days a week, except holidays.

“I can’t begin to explain the joy we feel at the end of the day just to feel a little tired.” – Murray French, The Grand Seduction

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