“But I was used to finding something deadly in things that attracted me; there was always something deadly lurking in anything I wanted, anything I loved.”
― John Knowles, A Separate Peace
Do you like how you are when you have a crush?
Having a crush – for me – is double-edged sword. On one edge, I up my game: clothes, hair, smarts. I use basically every ace I have. I become a shinier, cleaner, proper version of me. Then there is the other edge. I act different from who I usually am. Though recognizable, yet somehow different: louder, brasher, and stranger. A friend said I am more tolerable, not like others who have it worse.
Just how worse?
In two words: online stalking. In the age of the Internet and the social media, gleaning information from various sources is almost easy. And there’s so much more knowledge available on the Web, that it could be quite overwhelming. Have just the name or a photo and search engines would reveal to you things that even the parents of that person don’t know about. And all that without even hacking!
But if that isn’t bad enough, people like my friend Marvin experienced actual stalking. And I do mean girl-follows-boy-from-their-school-to-his-home kind of stalking. Uncomfortable is an understatement.
Yet who hasn’t exceeded limits?
Maybe somewhere in our heads, what we did or what we do because of The Crush makes sense. Our actions would lead to the results that we want. That one dream of ours would come true. The end justifies the means. And when all that fails and we lose more than we bargained for, we wonder where we went wrong, how we could be smart in a stupid way.